Wednesday 1 June 2011

Relocation of Edinburgh Castle

AnElephantCant help feeling sorry
For the problems that Princes Street faces
This great thoroughfare
Built with such care
In a city of such airs and graces

Edinburgh New Town was designed to be perfect
With George Street the jewel in the crown
But folk vote with their feet
And soon Princes Street
Was the most popular shopping in town

On a rock high above stands the castle
It is Scotland’s most desirable location
But one tourist said
While scratching his head
Why did you build it so close to the station?

Glasgow has its own retail problems
The old main streets are fast being closed
For each charity shop
An independent is chopped
And consumers are leaving in droves

Young mums prefer out of town centres
Where shopping is less of a pain
You drive there stress free
And park for no fee
Stroll around with no thought for the rain

We do have a solution to all this
We do not just trumpet for fun
The decline can be stopped
With a wee simple swap
Just listen to what can be done

Glasgow takes over the castle
And rebuilds it close to the river
It can’t be denied
That close to the Clyde
The locals would think it wiz jist pure dead clever

We give Edinburgh the St Enoch Centre
To locate where the castle now isn’t
A capital delight
With shops on both sides
We’d soon see that the spending had risen

This solution will keep everyone happy
Princes Street with not one side but two
We’ll all be well off
With the postcards we sell of
Scotland’s best known landmark with a great river view!

1 comment:

  1. And it's not just cities that are sufferin'
    Wee toons the breadth and the length
    Add up their takings
    And things not of their making
    Yearly shrink the pot by a tenth

    Its clear different levels of business
    Can vary their values and 'face'
    'Unacceptable' Tesco, me at the 'coal'
    But it's clear
    Just who's winning the race