Monday 17 October 2011

Who wants to live forever

AnElephantCant get too excited
About what happens to him after he’s dead
He hopes he’s not lost
At sea or squashed
He’d like to pop off his clogs in his bed

Though he is not too fussed about after
It will be nice if a few friends come round
A story or three
And a nice cup of tea
When he’s been neatly tucked into the ground

Or maybe he’ll just get cremated
Not really a cause for concern
A wee puff of smoke
A laugh and a joke
And he’ll be sitting there in a big urn

Now it turns out there are other options
A whole new array of attractions
Such as Resomation*
For your information
It’s a method of body liquefaction

In Florida this is a boom thing
Because it is more eco-friendly
In fact it is no less
Than a chemical process
You could say it’s a bit sticky-endy

The other idea is Promession*
Where the body is carefully freeze-dried
It ends up all brittle
You tap it a little
And get a pile of dust about knee high

Now AnElephant isn’t sure that he likes this
Though no doubt it is all very clever
With typical candour
Like the mythical Highlander
He thinks it’s better to just live forever

AnElephant has one more suggestion
Which boosts the economy of our wee nation
Relax in your vault
With a bottle of malt
And drink till you reach distillification

*For more info:

1 comment:

  1. All these options seem just a bit too hard
    Leaving one's soul somewhat battered and scarred
    But your plan for distillification
    Causes me some consternation
    I thought you guys had your own Elephant's Graveyard